hiwind

Files

Under Constant Construction!

Check Updates to see what's new. Progs, Free Code, Nostalgia, Stories, Chat Simulator, & much, much more coming soon. Get excited!

This site is for educational purposes only. Proceed at your own risk.

Best viewed at 1024 x 768

Updates

What's New?

Late August: Chat Simulator v 1.1.0!! Guestbook!
Early August: Chat Simulator Beta!! Brofist, Mortal Kombat, Chrono Trigger, Mr. T, ColecoVision! Links added. Some Nostalgia.
July: Site launched. Podcast episode released. Fate X 5.0 discovered! AOL Wars chronicled.
June: Hiwind awakens from a long slumber and begins to reminisce.

Progs

Progs by Hiwind and Friends

Table of Contents
- Coming Soon

rarenet

i2 crack

i2 toolbox

method-1

method-2

method-3

method-4

Free Code

Free Code by Hiwind

under construction! content for this section is coming soon....

hiwind.bas

The Original hiwind.bas


  .hhh^"      @II>   w=~                @II>                  DD         
:hHHH         %II    WWw.   .w.   .w.   %II       n.    n.   'DDDD.      
`HHHH          .    'WWWWW. WWW:  WWW    .     n@NNnn@NNn.  '*DDDDDdd   
 HHHH .hHh   .@IIi  `WWWW  WWWW  WWWW  .@IIi  ^"NNNN""NNNN"    ^"*DDDDD  
 HHHH~?HHHH ''IIII`  WWWW  WWWW  WWWW ''IIII`   NNNN  NNNN   dDDD  "DDDD 
 HHHH  HHHH   IIII   WWWW  WWWW  WWWW   IIII    NNNN  NNNN   DDDD   DDDD 
 HHHH  HHHH   IIII   WWWW  WWWW  WWWW   IIII    NNNN  NNNN   DDDD   DDDD 
 HHHH  HHHH   IIII  .WWWW  WWWW. WWW    IIII    NNNN  NNNN   DDDD  DDDD 
 HHHH  HHHH   III&   `%WW%``"*WWWW"     IIII   "*NN*" NNNN" .DDDD..DDD  
hHHHH= HHH>   IIII"    `~     `"        IIII"    ""   'N"    `"DDD*""   
 `H"   HHH     ""                         ""                     ""      
      HHH"                                                               
      @%                                                                 
    :"

At long last, the much deserved credits for development and distribution and inspiration of hiwind.bas!

many thanks to: darkknight, kai, meca, method, pen, soop

additional thanks to: bad, bong, bossman, drako, epic, exe, fantasee, fenix, few, fin, flek, foam, fone, forge, future, gate, gizmo, huc, idle, indo, layzie, liquid, masta, nemo, nemur, nitro, osb, osiris, qop, qtip, ren, sabu, sk8, todai, view

extra thanks to: all my friends (and enemies) in private rooms: clerks, test, mirage, vb3

and finally: thanks to chisox, meca, and venim for keeping me humble all these years.

The full, original, and interactive hiwind.bas coming soon!

Nostalgia

Table of Contents

JeffK vs HitMikey

My AIM friend Mikey sent JeffK (what he thought was) a brutal burn.. he wasn't prepared for JeffK's onslaught of destruction that followed...

Modern Dating

OH Screename: "Patty"

I signed on the Overhead AOL Screename "Patty". I started getting tons of ims..

Royalbee7: Hi Savannah
Patty: Hi Chicago!
Patty: Behir Behir! lets get funky tonight!
Royalbee7: who is this
Patty: Jack is that you?
Patty: are you looking forward to tonight?
Royalbee7: no
Patty: remember that you have to pick up the cake at 7pm
Patty: NO!
Patty: what do you mean no!
Patty: we've been planning this for 3 years!
Patty: oh you bastard
Royalbee7: this is not jack
Patty: i stayed slim for you... cooked and cleaned for you and am carrying your child!
Patty: I am carrying your child!
Patty: thats right Jack im pregnant!
Patty: and now you just want to call the wedding off!
Patty: wait till your mother hears about this!
Royalbee7: this is not jack
Patty: Quiet! i have heard enough!
Royalbee7: hello
Patty: Goodbye Jack!
Royalbee7: this is not jack
Royalbee7: who are you
Patty: Have fun finding another girl to carry your broke ass around Jack!
Patty: with a Penis as small as yours i doubt youll ever get anyone pregnant again!
Patty: BYE!
[5minutes later]
Patty: I just called your Mother Jack! and she is furious!
Patty: i hope she ties you up to her car and drags you through the streets of Cleveland!
Patty: GOODBYE FOREVER ASSHOLE!

JayeShort: Are you home?
Patty: Jack just dumped me!
Patty: after we planned the wedding for 3 years!
Patty: How could he!
JayeShort: I don't know what you are talking about. I thought you were Patty Roach.
Patty: Roach? who are you calling a Roach!
Patty: oh you are just as bad as him!
JayeShort: I thought I was. No, I am worse.
Patty: you are banging him arent you!
Patty: you stole him from me!
Patty: i knew you were more than just his secretary!
Patty: oh wait till i get my hands on you!
JayeShort: Ofr course. Yes I stole him, doesn't matter that I am 65 years old.
Patty: oh i knew he liked em freaky!
Patty: but this is ridiculous
JayeShort: We were very inventive in the office--on the desk in the waste basket, you name it.
Patty: ok lets play that game
Patty: I know you this is Jane. I know he cheats on me with you! Well tell him this!
Patty: remember last month when John came down from Canada
Patty: and I told him we went to the movies
Patty: well..
Patty: we didnt! i did him baby! i did him crazy!
Patty: Fine take him Jane! take him. You carry his broke ass around! I've had it!

BADBELVA: hi, what are you doing?
Patty: telling my ex boyfriend off
Patty: hes an asshole
BADBELVA: which one?
Patty: Jack
BADBELVA: jack off?
Patty: the one i was getting married to tonight!
Patty: oh he was cheating on me with his secretary
Patty: i just found out
Patty: and im carrying his baby!
Patty: life couldnt get worse
BADBELVA: well its better to find out now
Patty: and here you are telling me to go "jack off"
Patty: go fuck yourself asshole

Slang

Lingo by hiwind

AOHacksaw:	Kids who hung out on AOL in the 90s participating in "illegal" activites.
Bacon:	A highly enjoyable activity.
Bathroom Break:	A scene or several consecutive scenes in a movie that are nothing but boring.
Behir:	An undefined word that is just plain fun to say.
Biscuts:	Breasts.
Breakfast:	Fruit Rollups, Orange Sherbert, Tang.
Cement:	A stubborn individual.
Dinner:	Fruit Rollups, Orange Sherbert, Tang.
Gravy:	To spill something that leaves a stain.
Hacksaw:	Someone who believes they are better at a certain activity than they actually are. Also, someone who believes that a specific thing is something that it is not.
Howls:	Being extremely ill.
Hubba:	A faster way of saying "Be Quiet!" or "Stop!".
Creepers:	When you just can't believe it to be possible or true.
Jibs:	Big lips. Bubba from "Forrest Gump" has Jibs.
Lunch:	Fruit Rollups, Orange Sherbert, Tang.
Mike:	What you call someone who's name you don't know. Being such a common name, you have a higher chance of actually getting a person's name right.
Minute Waster:	Something unproductive that typically takes close to a minute to finish.
Oy:	A quick word to fill conversation. This is better than silence because it will show the other person that you are listening but you just are not sure what to say.
Pancakes:	An easy girl or a girl that enjoys sex. Female porno stars are "Pancakes".
Slop Face:	To eat something that normally requires hands without hands. A good "Slop Face" includes a portion of the food on your face afterward. Randy "Slop Faces" his mash potatoes in "A Christmas Story".
Smissed:	Short for "Dismissed".
String:	A musician that performs music and lyrics that they did not write, dances to steps they did not choreograph, and lives off an image that they do not deserve.
Unsheathe:	To perform an amazing feat that you will, most likely, never perform again.
Yelp:	To swallow your food whole. Dogs are known for this.
Waffles:	An girl that fears sex. A priss. Opposite of "Pancakes".
Zookeeper:	Manager. The person in charge.

Wav Files

Pure Uncompressed Audio

under construction! content for this section is coming soon....

Chat

Chat Simulator v 1.1.0

Contact

Get in Touch with hiwind

Looking for prime warez & progs.

Will trade for Visual Basic 3 Pro, Adobe Photoshop, and Front Page.

Email:

Chat:

Media:

Social:

Greets

Supz in Da Twenty Twenty Two

Podcast

AOL Underground Podcast

I was recently interviewed by Stoney. Enjoy!

RE-AOL

RE-AOL Patreon and Discord

Relive your glory days on AOL 3.0 today!

Brofist

Brofist - The Ultimate Thumbs Up!

Mortal
Kombat

Mortal Kombat: The True Story

	Shang Tsung: "Wow, those are nice pants. Looks like I'll have to take them off of you."
	Shang Tsung: "Your broth.. Hello?! Camera 1! Not camera 2!"
	Shang Tsung: "That's better. Ok. Here I go... Your brother's hole is mine! Yours will be next!"
	Lui Kang: "Elder, I had the dream again. I must go defeat Shang Tsung." Elder: "No, young, powerful, strong, succulent, juicy, tasty, scrumdidliumptious warrior. Your dream simply means that you should stay here and give me some honey, baby!" Lui Kang: "But, Master.. I.."
	Lui Kang: "Oh, what the hell. Let's do this!"
	Rayden: "What's going on here? Why wasn't I invited to the party?!"
	Rayden: "Wait till you see my lightening rod!"
	Sub-Zero: "Oh! It hurts! It hurts! Hello? Where is everybody? Hey!? I got a cramp working out again! C'mon guys. Hello?"
	Lui Kang: "Whew. I'm exhausted." Elder: "Your Martial Arts training really paid off, Lui. If you know what I mean."
	Sonya: "Hello? Guys? Hot, bound chick in short skirt here! Hello? Hello?.... Where are those morons?"
The End.
by Hiwind

Chrono
Trigger

Chrono Trigger - Corridors of Time

March 11, 1995, I dashed home with a copy of Chrono Trigger and began an odyssey into gaming perfection. Walking into the Zeal Kingdom for the first time and hearing the opening notes of Corridors of Time transported me entirely to another world. I was completely enveloped in the experience and that song has stuck with me for 27+ years. It remains to this day, my favorite song. Not just my favorite video game song. My favorite song. Of any genre. Period.

Mr. T

I Pity the Fool!

Coleco
Vision

ColecoVision

My first videogame console. I sat in front of a giantic tube TV in the 80s thinking "it will NEVER get better than this!" I was right. It hasn't.

Presenting my 24 most favorite ColecoVision games.